Q. Where were you born and where did you grow up?

A. I was born in Montreal, Canada and was raised in a suburban city on the island of Montreal. I lived with my parents and younger brother, and then I moved to the city when I was 21.  

Q. At what age did you come out? And how did it go? 

A. I came out to some friends as a teen (17-18 years old) and said I was bisexual at the time. I think it was mostly because I still wanted to be included in conversations about boys. Honestly, it was also because I has trouble accepting myself as a lesbian. I thought that a bisexual identity was “half gay”, which makes no sense at all – but that was my thought process at the time. 

Eventually I had my first girlfriend when I was 18, and then came out to my mom. It didn’t go well. I won’t give too much detail, but it really affected our relationship; I was close to my mom growing up and all of a sudden we were strangers.

I chose to move out at 21 so I could stop lying to my parents and living a more normal life. I really think that this saved me and it also saved my relationship with my mom. Fast forward a couple of years: when I was 25 I told her about a horrible break up I had gone through, and she finally told me that she knows I am gay and is ok with it – ultimately, she just wants me to be happy. My dad on the other hand still doesn’t know about my sexuality – we are not close. I thought for a long time it was because he’s Israeli and close-minded, but my family here in Israel is very supportive and accepting. My relationship with him is just complex.

Q. Were you involved at all in the LGBT community back home? 

A. Yes, when I was 17 to 19 years old I was part of an LGBT+ “club” in college. It was a really great way to meet people around my age who also identified as LGBT+ teens/young adults. It was also a safe place to meet and talk to girls (I used to be very shy, so this was a great community for me).

Q. What is your involvement (if any) in the LGBT community in Israel?  

A. I am currently not involved with the Israeli LGBT community, however I followed some Facebook and Instagram pages which eventually lead me to an LGBT+ Olim WhatsApp group, and then to a women’s-only group. From there, I met a few girls (also immigrants) that I became close friends with. I was very lucky! 

Q. How long since you made Aliyah? 

A. I made Aliyah a year and a half ago, in July 2019.

Q. Did you move here on your own or with family/friends/significant other? 

A. I moved here on my own, but also technically with my ex. She moved to Jerusalem for rabbinical studies and I chose to live in Tel Aviv for water polo and work. We did a long-distance thing for about 4 or 5 months. It was tough and we didn’t work out.

Q. Why did you make Aliyah? 

A. I wanted to come to Israel for a long time. I didn’t know if I wanted to do a MASA program after university, if I wanted to study here, or make Aliyah. When I was with my ex in 2018-2019, I was also playing water polo in Canada and I was on a very strong team – one of the best in the country. At the same time, I was a master’s student planning to graduate in June 2019. One thing lead to another, and I ended up moving to Israel right after graduation and playing water polo here. I played for about 11 months, until COVID-19 restrictions got very serious.

Q. How is it going so far? 

A. I’m super happy right now. At the moment I don’t play water polo. I might be back into it someday, but for now I’m happy without playing. I am working on my career as an epidemiologist and I’ve been at my job for over a year. It’s exciting to work in this field during a pandemic. I’m still working out a lot; I’ve starting biking, running and longboarding. I also workout at the gym/home gym, so I have a lot of options to keep busy and active.

As for my personal life, I became very close with some family here. I have a cousin who feels like another brother to me and an aunt who feels like a second mother. I also met my current partner here. She is Israeli and probably one of the smartest and funniest women I have ever met. I can really see a future for myself here with her.

Q. What do you do in terms of work?

A. I’m an epidemiologist; I work with medical data and I do different research projects that require data analysis to investigate disease causality, disease progression, medication patterns, and more.

Q. How is your Ivrit?

A. I’m a bit shy to speak Hebrew but I do have basic conversations with people when I’m shopping, for example. I also try to speak with my girlfriend and family – I just have to build up some more confidence. I took Ulpan for 5 months, twice a week, in the evenings and it really helped! I have another course starting next month – I’m hoping I will have a breakthrough and stop being so shy. 

Q. What has been your biggest challenge so far?

A. The Hebrew has been tough – I work full time and I don’t have the ability to take on more Hebrew classes so my learning pace is “slow” but I am definitely learning. It’s just hard not understanding everything around me 100% of the time. I also struggle not seeing my family from Canada. I haven’t seen them in over a year now and it breaks my heart – this is due to the pandemic though. Hopefully I’ll see them this summer for a month or so.

Q. How do you perceive the Israeli LGBT community? 

A. I live in Tel Aviv and I have had to opportunity to meet people through online groups where everyone was very friendly. I think my biggest challenge is meeting LGBT+ Israelis – probably because of the language. I went to one LGBT Olim event, a Karaoke night in early 2020, and it was really fun! Aside from that, I’m hoping to attend more events once COVID-19 restrictions are lifted.

Q. How is being LGBT in Israel different to back home?  

A. The scene in Tel Aviv is similar to my experience in Montreal – a lot of people are accepting but you always have a few random people that will stare at you for holding hands with your partner. Outside of Tel Aviv I don’t think I would feel comfortable holding hands with her – I just don’t want to start trouble or feel unsafe. 

I held hands with my ex a few times in Jerusalem and felt very unsafe; we had experiences where men yelled at us. It was not fun.

Q. If you were making Aliyah now, would you do anything differently?

A. Maybe I’d read or practice my Hebrew a bit more, but aside from that, nope. I never had a “go with the flow” adventure before. My life was very planned out and for once, I just kind of did whatever and hoped for the best. I had nothing to lose and it’s been great so far.